IT'S TEACHER'S DAY.. a day to acknowledge miracles!!

September 5^th is one of the most special days of the year for me.. probably right “up there” along with my birthday! There is a very important reason for this.. it is the official day for a celebration of my “finding my calling” in life and living it with complete joy and dedication!

I have mentioned earlier that I grew up being “Papa’s Princess” and pampered to the hilt.. but one thing was sacrosanct.. I HAD to do something “substantial and meaningful” with my life! Being happily “headless and unaware” I floated through college not really giving my future a serious thought!

After graduating with a Bachelor’s degree in Arts with Psychology and Philosophy, there weren’t really too many exciting options so I drifted into Law.. for want of something better to do.. After a year of falling asleep in class (and inspite of a First Class in the exam) I dropped out because it was dry as dust and didn’t excite me in the least..

Everyone said I had “a way with words” so I dabbled in Advertising but found it too “pretentious and fake”.. selling a sub-standard product to an unsuspecting public went against my basic nature so I dropped out of that too! I attempted to do a course in Special Education remotely but realized that distance learning wasn’t for me either! By this time Daddy was firm and clear.. “Take a year off.. find the course you really WANT to do.. and DO it!”

I researched practically every course that was available in South Mumbai AND FINALLY DECIDED TO DO THE Post-Graduate Diploma in Early Childhood Education” at Nirmala Niketan.. My reasons weren’t the most praiseworthy.. I wanted to do something that would never be a 9 to 5 job.. needed lots of holidays and full weekends off.. Nursery Teacher’s Training would be a cakewalk.. I thought!

Nothing could have been further from the truth as it turned out.. it was a two year course condensed crammed and squished into a one year course and we had to work hard.. and I mean REALLY hard! Had I realized this lazy me would never have signed up for it.. but then it was a matter of “do or die in the attempt” because by then I wanted to make Daddy and my teachers proud and justify their faith in me and my abilities!

Learning the process of creating an environment conducive for children to “learn by doing” fascinated me.. and this is where my somewhat above average communication skills stood me in good stead! Being with children is to see “magic” happen all through the day.. watching them experiment.. succeed.. fail.. repeat.. and learn taught me patience.. gave me confidence.. awakened my curiosity.. taught me that it was OKAY to “make a fool of myself to entertain the children” and felt like I was FINALLY doing what I was made to do!

The joy of learning and doing what I loved made me always feel like “I was never going to work” and that no two days were ever the same made it something I looked forward to every single day! Acting and narrating stories.. making up and singing songs (even though I was never and am still NOT musical).. cajoling reluctant little people to try and taste something they had never eaten before.. coming home full of paint Fevicol and sand felt so worthwhile because there were such incredibly poignant hilarious magical and sometimes heartbreaking stories connected to those stains..

I was incredibly fortunate to do a wide and varied body of work within the “Early Childhood Education” space.. taught children.. supervised teacher trainees.. became a resource person and conducted workshops.. trained teachers.. planned programmes for young children for Aptech Computers.. designed curriculum for children at Euro Kids.. and ran an NGO called the “Salaam Baalak Trust” for street children!

Looking back at my 25 years of teaching.. I am so incredibly grateful for ALL the miracles along the way.. the brilliant teachers I had (Jana Nalini Nandita and Roshan) .. the most fun and inspiring colleagues (Sangeeta Neelam Anu Renu Sadhana Sucheta Rajshree Milind Vaishali and many more) the “bright as buttons” children in my care (Vibhav Anubhav Anshuman and Tasneem to name a few.. and the complete faith and trust of the parents in me!

Whether I’m volunteering at a Balwadi.. or playing games with tribal children.. my happiest space is in the classroom.. wherever it may be! When I’m old and grey (which I technically AM even now!!) I can still see myself dancing around the classroom and animatedly acting out the “Chooha Raja” story or explaining a concept to children!

I could have been so many things.. but am utterly blessed that I got to be a teacher.. a facilitator of learning.. a tear wiper.. a substitute Mamma.. a co-conspirator in mischief.. a storyteller.. a demonstrator.. a question asker.. a witness and participant to and in the magic of miracles that happen wherever little children are every single day!

And so on Teacher’s Day.. with folded hands I bow and convey my heartfelt to everyone who has taught me anything and everything that I have learned in life.. my parents and family.. the children I have taught and their parents.. my colleagues.. friends.. staff.. neighbours.. doctors..

To share my bestest compliment ever.. A little boy in my class when asked by his mother as to who his favourite "Auntie" (that's what we teachers were called) was.. categorically stated "I like all the Aunties.. but I LOVE Pallavi Auntie.. because she's small.just like me"!! Truly a memory to cherish for always!! 

For teaching me to care.. to share.. to laugh.. to love.. to have compassion empathy and discipline.. to be punctual honest and respectful.. and most of all.. to allow me to be ME.. 100% without any filters.. and accept me for who I am.. THANK YOU.. HAPPY TEACHER’S DAY.. AND I LOVE YOU ALL!!

P.S. Blogspot always plays spoilsport and doesn't show your names when you write a comment.. so please add your names! Thank you!!

RAKSHABANDHAN.. it's all about being connected..

 RAKSHABANDHAN.. it’s all about being connected..

Today is Rakshabandhan.. the festival that celebrates the bond between brother and sister.. the promise that the brother makes to always “be there” for his sister in times of trouble and “protect her” (do her “raksha”) from danger.. Thinking about this particular bond and all kinds of relationships got me thinking..

A bond is basically a connect and something that sort of “ties” people to each other in a positive way.. and that’s why it’s a celebration right? We are surrounded by protection and umpteen people who are “there” for us in times of need.. even though it may not be very obvious to us all the time!

As young children, our parents are our “bodyguards”.. they save us from falling (physical protection) and as we grow up.. from crying (emotional protection) from deprivation (financial protection) and they are solidly “there “ for us no matter what!

Our siblings are our “partners in crime” and our sharers of responsibility and blame (as the case may be).. they are often our loyal co-conspirators and our biggest secret keepers (especially while planning surprises for our parents.. and our biggest defenders and protectors from our parent’s wrath when we are in big trouble!

Times have changed a great deal now and with so many youngsters settling abroad.. our friends have become the family we choose for ourselves.. and they are often also protecting us.. be it from going astray.. acquiring bad habits.. associating with the wrong kind of people.. nursing us through an illness etc..

Rather than feeling compelled to follow rituals and tie a “rakhi”.. “utaaro aarti” and feed mithai simply because it’s the “done thing”.. why can’t we just spend some quality “one on one” time together with everyone who loves us and acknowledge their presence care and concern in so many words?

Do the people who are our protectors really even know what’s happening to us in real life? Do they know about our joys and stresses.. our anxieties and concerns.. our failures and victories? If they matter to us.. the should know.. they need to know.. simply because protection can be a heartfelt prayer.. a bear hug.. a sleepover full of reminiscences and stories..

Protection comes disguised in so many different ways.. it could be a “Call and let me know you reached home safely” or “Surprise! I made your favourite pasta for dinner” or “Today we’re both switching off our mobiles and doing a proper catch up” or “When I was praying this morning, I asked God to bless you especially” or "Haven't heard from you in such a long time.. hope all is well" or even just a “I’m here for you and always will be”..

Recognize the people you share your strongest bonds with.. acknowledge and appreciate them.. love nurture and cherish them.. keep in touch through calls and messages.. and never hesitate to express how you feel.. and above all else..

Remember.. love in your heart wasn’t put there to stay.. because love isn’t love until you give it away!!

Wishing you bonds of caring and sharing.. prayers and protection.. bonhomie and brotherhood.. love and laughter.. today.. tomorrow.. and every day thereafter!!

P.S. If you would like to post a comment.. please share your name.. this website is a little peculiar and doesn't show it automatically! Thank you so much! 

 

 

 

SOMETHING THAT HAPPENS TO US ALL.. be "tuned in" and aware!!

 Have you ever come away from meeting with or finished a conversation with someone you always thought was a very close friend (or family member) feeling like “What’s going on? It felt like there was just no “connect” in the conversation.. or.. Why doesn’t he/she understand what I’m trying to say.. or.. It feels like I’m talking to someone I don’t know anymore..” This happens to all of us at various points in time and we need to introspect as to WHY this is so.. It has been happening to me of late and I finally came to an answer which actually SHOOK me..

 One of life’s challenging realizations is that sometimes you outgrow your friends.. difficult to accept? Definitely.. but unless you accept it.. your own growth will not progress.. and you will not be able to alter and change certain patterns of thinking and behaviour that you need to.. if you want to get onto your spiritual path.. As I have mentioned earlier, getting onto one’s spiritual path and staying on it is essential if you want to grow as a person and get a realistic perspective on life.. and on yourself..

As we go through life we have a variety of experiences and meet and interact with different kinds of people.. some happy.. some not so happy.. some exciting and others boring.. some comfortable and others awkward.. How we feel about the experience and how we react/respond to the people is determines by our state of mind and heart at the time.. and our instinct as well.. As an example, let’s say we have school friends with whom we have played mischievous pranks.. mimicked our teachers and giggled at silly jokes which was great fun when we were young.. but seems downright stupid disrespectful and a waste of time 30 or 40 years later..

This happens because as we grow older and wiser in years.. we subconsciously and actively seek out like-minded people who have similar hobbies passions interests and value systems.. Those of us who are wise beyond our years realize and recognize the need to change and evolve in order to raise our levels of awareness and growth.. Some of us are lucky and blessed to find a mentor teacher or “guru” who conveys this directly or indirectly.. and a few unfortunates don’t realize and go through the major part of their lives comfortably tucked into their deep comfortable ruts and have no interest whatsoever in changing or evolving.. and that is SAD..

Speaking for myself, I was a typical giddy-headed Papa’s princess.. always higher than most on emotions and reasonably so on IQ but not necessarily on EQ.. Impulsive outspoken emotional and possessive about my friends, life gave me some hard knocks before I realized that it was wiser to be spontaneous tactful and not be TOO attached to the people I cared about! Buckets of tears were cried.. cartons full of tissues were used.. sleepless nights were suffered.. too many Tylenols were swallowed before I started paying attention to people who seemed to “have it all together”.. and HOW they were so different from me!

Deep and meaningful conversations with friends who are clear thinkers were enlightening.. and there was an overwhelming wealth of wisdom in the right books that were suggested to me to read.. Knowing that I get clarity when I write things down, I actually sat down and analyzed the friends and people in my life in terms of what they bring to the friendship.. how they make me feel.. what they teach me.. how I feel when I meet them etc.. It was very difficult to acknowledge to myself that there are some friends and/or family members that I have outgrown.. but it HAD to be done!

It has been an exceedingly empowering exercise and has helped me to understand things like this:

I have outgrown people who are envious of me.. I have outgrown the consistently negative people.. the ones who complain all the time.. the ones who take me for granted.. and believe me, they exist! The list is long so am sharing a quote by Chanda Kaushik that says it better than I would ever be able to..

“I have outgrown many things. I have outgrown relatives who gladly offer criticism but not support. I have outgrown my need to meet my family's unrealistic expectations of me. I have outgrown girls who wear masks and secretly rejoice at my misfortunes. I have outgrown shrinking myself for boys who are intimidated by my intelligence and outspoken nature. I have outgrown friends who cannot celebrate my accomplishments. I have outgrown people who conveniently disappear whenever life gets a little dark. I have outgrown those who take pleasure in gossiping and spreading negativity. I have outgrown dull, meaningless conversations that feel forced. I have outgrown those who don't take a stand against ignorance and injustice. I have outgrown trying to please everyone. I have outgrown society constantly telling me I'm not beautiful, smart, or worthy enough. I have outgrown trying to fix every little flaw. I have outgrown my tendency to fill my mind with self-doubt and insecurity. I have outgrown trying to find reasons not to love myself. I have outgrown anything and anyone that does not enrich the essence of my soul. I have outgrown many things, and I've never felt freer.”

Will sign off here with a heartfelt request.. sit down.. think.. analyse.. acknowledge.. and accept.. Some people were a part of your story.. some people are a part of it.. and a few will always be a part of it.. because you choose it to be that way! Don’t feel guilty.. it’s natural and just the way life is meant to be.. We all have only one life to live.. so raise the bar and live a quality life with the people that enrich your soul!

26/11.. and why I survived it!!

 I woke up this morning all bright and chirpy and then looked at the calendar.. saw that it is 26/11.. said to myself "Hmmm.. so today's the day to be thankful and celebrate.." 

26/11 has been a remarkable day in my life.. it was the first time I saw imminent death at the closest quarters.. As most of you know.. I was sitting at Cafe Leopold with two close friends when the terrorists opened fire.. and we literally froze.. understood what was happening.. and ran for our lives.. all in the space of less than a minute! We were both lucky and blessed to find shelter and were holed up all night in a little room 8'x10' just opposite Bade Miyan the kababwalla.. actually SAW a terrorist running through the lane towards the Taj firing his AK-47 enthusiastically as he went..

Needless to state.. we all survived and got home safe and sound the next morning.. safe for sure.. but SOUND? Not really.. I was glued to the tv for the next two days.. went through tremendous survivor guilt.. was traumatized by what I had seen and heard.. but I survived.. unlike so many others.. It was then that I saw to WHAT extreme the human spirit can be driven.. that so much aggression violence and hatred could be unleashed so very mercilessly on so many..

Many years have elapsed since that dark night and I have asked myself time and again why I was one of those who survived? I wouldn't have left behind a heartbroken spouse.. significant other.. or children.. whether dependent or independent! 

Introspection about this has convinced me that I survived because there were still lessons I had to learn.. things I needed to do.. elderly parents I was responsible for.. friends I hadn't met yet.. people that needed my help.. and a lot of sharing I still had to do.. whether it was social intellectual emotional or financial..

Realization dawned and I started taking life one day at a time.. stopped taking my blessings for granted.. practising gratitude actively.. I nursed both my parents through several major illnesses both physical and mental.. There were days that were frustrating and exhausting but my inner core resilience came to the fore and life went on.. as it always does..

When I lost Daddy in 2017 it was as if my world had come to an end with no light at the end of the tunnel.. but that was when I got a tremendous amount of support from very close friends who "carried me through" and allowed me to grieve.. and gather myself once more!

The pandemic was a blessing for me because that gave me quality time with myself and with a very dear friend who shared some truly inspiring conversations thoughts and discussions with me.. I began looking within and questioning my own thoughts and actions.. it gave me a lot of clarity and put me firmly on the spiritual path and convinced me to try and be the best version of myself that I could..

My Dad had some incredible qualities like being disciplined.. organized.. particular.. generous

and practical.. which I always admired! He was a very special person and my main aim in life is to be someone that he would respect and admire too! 

I KNOW that I survived 26/11 because I have determination.. faith.. integrity.. generosity.. and a deep desire to reach out to and help people.. inspire them.. and try to make this world a better kinder and nicer place for everyone!

God bless and much love to everyone reading this! Stay happy.. stay well.. stay safe.. and be kind..

ReplyForward

Happy Children's Day!!

 Happy Children’s Day.. today and always!!

Children are our greatest teachers.. they inculcate in us the wonderful qualities of patience determination kindness trust resilience and curiosity.. Most importantly they demonstrate simply just by being.. the pure joy that comes from giving and receiving unconditional love!

When I decided to do my Post-Graduate Diploma in Early Childhood Education, a number of people said to me “Oh, so you’re a nursery school teacher? You must really love children!” That really set me thinking as to WHY I opted for this particular profession.. and I realized that I love children pretty much as much as the next person.. BUT.. what fascinates me is how each one is so different and the process by which they learn!

Some children are visual learners while others are auditory and yet others are tactile or sensory.. some are calm while others are boisterous.. some are independent while others are a little less so.. When I look back after spending 25 years in the classroom.. I realize that children taught me what life is all about.. and how it needs to be lived..

They taught me to accept that everyone is different and unique and needs to be accepted just the way they are.. that every day we live should be filled with “Ohmigod” moments of amazement wonder and excitement.. that a nice warm hug from someone you love is the most immediate and effective first aid for any hurt..

I learned that all of us are creative in some way.. that smiling and laughing often make you happy and healthy in the head and heart.. that it’s magical to be happy for no reason.. and to ASK properly when you really need something!

Children make us happy elated frustrated exhausted impatient and drive us mad at times.. but on the flip side they awaken pure joy acceptance kindness compassion patience and unconditional love as well..

They teach us that we all need boundaries.. because they give us a sense of security.. that consistency in thought word and deed is essential to build character.. and that manners and morals can never be taught but must be “caught”.. because children learn what they live with!

As we go through life it’s important to remember that “growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional” so remain childlike.. Make a conscious effort to seek the magic.. to stay lighthearted.. celebrate everything.. SHARE.. and most of all.. be kind to others and ourselves!

Today being November 14^th, we celebrate Children’s Day which is super special.. we appreciate children for the happiness they bring to our lives and for making our world a happier more positive place.. and in the immortal words of Henry Ward Beecher “Children are the hands by which we take hold of heaven”..

Happy Children’s Day to the child that’s still alive in you!

 

MAGICAL EVERYDAY MOMENTS.. cherish them all..

When we speak of magic we should speak of those moments that were the purest.. when the stars were bright and the laughter was loud.. Those are the most magical moments in life.. right up there next to when babies smile their first toothy grin that made your heart almost melt.. or when you break open your piggy bank and have much more in there than you thought you did.. or when you get a surprise visit from an old friend you had lost touch with for ages.. or when you get a proper hug that takes your stress away.. or when you have a deeply satisfying conversation with YOURSELF..

The word "magic" conjures up whimsical and fantastic.. often larger-than-life and unbelievably fabulous images.. the word "Abracadabra" reverberates in the atmosphere of our imagination.. and we think of shooting stars rainbows miraculous feats and magicians in the obligatory black top hats chanting seemingly non-stop streams of exotic sounding gibberish! We imagine magic to be something from another realm and beyond the comprehension of our suddenly seemingly limited cognitive abilities.. and yet.. it is not so.. really and truly..

Having taught little children in pre-school for twenty-five years, I have been truly fortunate and blessed to witness magic first-hand on several occasions! You will ask me - where? how? what happened? Perhaps working with little children has given me a slightly different perspective.. but when (seemingly) strange signs squiggles and symbols start coming alive and making sense to a child.. and he or she learns to read.. THAT is genuinely magic for me! I have gotten goosebumps every time it has happened.. there’s just something so special about it!

Magic comes from inside you.. it’s a part of you and only YOU can awaken it and make miracles happen! You make it happen when you do the simplest things.. like brewing the perfect cup of coffee.. telling a story that has the listener hanging onto your every word.. sponsor the education of a deserving child.. cook a special meal for someone you love.. when you lie down on a beautifully made bed.. when you find a simple solution to a long-standing problem.. It happens when your intentions are perfectly “in sync” with the Universe and things just fall into place exactly as you had wanted them to!

As Richard M. Eyre says “The very best gift is that anyone can experience those unexpected twinkles of joy that make a magical moment. At these moments you feel true, deep joy because of a great new insight, a beautiful prospect, or a glimpse into the radiance of another soul. They are the magic moments when life seems better than you ever realized.”

Wishing you a day filled with truly magical moments.. and the ability to create magical moments for the people you love.. After all.. what’s life without a little magic?!

 

KINDNESS.. is an essential component of a happy life!!

 Joseph B. Wirthlin says, “Kindness is a passport that opens doors and fashions friends.. it softens hearts and moulds relationships that can last lifetimes.” Stop for a moment to think of it and it is so true.. it costs nothing and yet the returns are higher than even Adani or Reliance on the Bombay Stock Exchange!

The dictionary defines it thusly.. “Kindness is a type of behaviour marked by acts of generosity, consideration or concern for others, without expecting praise or reward. It is being selfless, caring and compassionate.” Being kind is actually something that should be our “default” always!

Kindness means more than being caring friendly and generous.. it can mean whatever you want it to mean.. It could mean going out of your way to give someone a lift even though you’re driving in a different direction.. cooking something special for a neighbour when they’re unwell.. sending flowers for no apparent reason at all to someone you love..

These days social media is constantly sending us messages related to building EQ more than IQ.. being politically correct.. and two such campaigns that truly resonated with me have been “pay it forward” and “practice random acts of kindness”! It’s such a lovely feeling to do unexpected things for people you know.. but even more fun to do them for the people you don’t! For instance, you could just pay a balloon seller for 5 balloons and ask them to give them free to the next 5 children who come to him.. and watch their faces light up when they get the balloons for free! Even if you don’t wait to watch this, you will have a smile that lights up your whole face.. and that’s a promise!

Random acts of kindness can be the simplest things like washing the breakfast dishes when your helper is in the bath.. or accompanying someone who lives alone to the doctor.. gifting a unique experience to someone for the first time – going parasailing.. doing a yoga or meditation class.. helping a friend arrange a messy cupboard etc.. As long as the recipient of your kindness is happy and touched.. that’s all that matters!

One morning I was travelling by BEST bus to go to the Sai Baba temple and there was just another gentleman on the bus. It was early in the morning and when the conductor came to sell him a ticket, he offered a 100 rupee note! The conductor was very annoyed and grumbled away saying “How can you expect change for 100 rupees early in the morning? Give me change!” the poor man didn’t HAVE change so I bought his ticket and that was the end of it.. or so I thought! He was profusely grateful and gracious and I got off at my stop and put the incident out of my mind! It was perhaps six months or a year later when I went to a xerox shop behind my house that the owner gave me my copies and refused to take the money.. it was the gentleman whose ticket I had paid for on the bus! I didn’t recognize him initially but he remembered and recognized me immediately! He introduced me to his sons and I always get instant service and a discounted rate (without asking for it).. and we are good friends to this day! Kindness has it’s own reward.. I have met some incredible people like this..

Kindness means doing nice things without expecting nice things in return.. and it’s not only about being nice when it’s easy.. it’s also about being kind even when it’s difficult. It can also mean putting your sorrow or grief aside to comfort another when their world is “falling apart” for some reason or the other.. that is TRUE kindness!

Kindness is a movement.

Has someone ever done something kind for you and all you wanted to do afterwards was pay it forward by doing something kind for someone else? That’s because kindness is a chain reaction. It’s a wave that keeps rolling, and all it takes is one person to start it. One small kind act can cause a ripple effect that impacts an entire community. If we are all focused on being kind, we are creating a movement of change.

We are all human and we make mistakes.. that’s why pencils have erasers right? We need to remember to be kind to ourselves and to others when these mistakes happen..

A few simple tips on how to be kind are thinking before speaking.. remembering that none of us are perfect.. be intentionally kind.. volunteer at an NGO.. pay compliments generously.. appreciate what people do for you.. Last but not the least.. practise.. practise.. practise! Positive reinforcement helps people want to do more good deeds and reminds them to do whatever they do with good intentions!

It's one thing to be taught kindness.. it’s another to be touched by it.. Wishing your life to be filled with opportunities for giving and receiving kindness every single day! And as always, thank you so much for reading!