GURU PURNIMA - I bow my head with folded hands..

 "Light another's path.. and the universe will light your own" such true words from the extremely wise author philosopher and entrepreneur Matshona Dhliwayo!

Guru Purnima is a red letter day for all those who have faith in their gurus.. who is a guru and why should we have one you must be asking? Traditionally, a guru is someone who assists and guides you on your spiritual journey.. it doesn't mean at ALL that you have to be ready to forgo worldly pleasures.. wear loose flowing robes.. sit in the church, temple, mosque or gurudwara.. but having a guru is the need of the hour!

In the pandemic situation.. stress levels are high and things are difficult for everyone.. whether it is stress at work.. lack of work.. discord at home.. financial worries.. interpersonal relationships.. feeling taken for granted.. lonely.. being unable to cope.. time management.. Within the stress.. it IS possible to cope much better if you channelize your internal guru! We have all been born with the "tattva" or essence of a guru inside us.. what remains to be done is to awaken that consciousness and we will get access to the greatest wisdom in the universe! The really good news is that it's relatively easy to tap into that wisdom.. all we need to do is be AWARE of what's going on around us.. 

Of course we're aware you think.. we're up to date on the latest in politics.. Bollywood gossip.. sports news.. the Page 3 scenario.. Covid statistics.. scientific research.. the arts and cultural scene.. trending fashion.. new age music etc.. that is sadly NOT the aware that really matters! What you need to be aware of is.. is everyone in your family in a good mindspace? Do your friends sound happy when you speak with them? Is someone facing a problem alone? Does your watchman look stressed about something? Does your staff at home seem content? Has the newspaper vendor who sits outside your building been coughing for too long? Have YOU been making mental notes to reach out and do something for a few people.. but haven't managed to convert that thought into a reality? You're obviously missing a guru! 

Perhaps someone has even gently reminded you to keep that promise you made to yourself.. but you didn't really register it.. it has happened to me innumerable times! Sometimes a friend or acquaintance has knowingly or unknowingly made an observation to you.. and that is the moment they are BEING your guru.. To share a personal experience, my friend Parul once told me "I am so happy to see that you have made such a tremendous effort to calm down and control your temper.. you seem so much more at peace and happier now".. it was a seemingly simple statement of fact - but had a HUGE impact on me! So rewarding that my efforts hadn't gone unnoticed and the benefits I was experienced were REAL ones and visible to others!

Gurus surround us disguised as various people.. anyone who accepts you AS YOU ARE.. encourages you.. believes in you.. tells you the truth.. holds up a (virtual) mirror to your face (especially when you're not being your best self).. holds your hand through the tough times.. and lets your fly and cheers you on is a GURU to you! This might be a parent.. teacher.. sibling.. friend.. gym trainer.. doctor.. neighbour.. work colleague.. mentor.. 

There are some qualities that a guru must have in order to fulfil their responsibilities in the best possible way - open acceptance of people.. wide knowledge and clarity of mind.. firm resolve to say and do the right thing.. wisdom sensitivity and compassion for others.. willingness to share life experiences.. practising kindness and good conduct.. and leading an inspirational life!

When I pause and reflect on the numerous gurus that have been and still are actively present in my life.. am just overwhelmed with gratitude.. gratitude that they are around me.. and also for the wisdom I have received to be able to perceive and recognize them as such! This post will be incomplete without naming a few of them..

Sumit - who is my best friend and rock solid support! He consistently inspires me to give more of myself.. reach out to others and shows me the sunny side of life even in the darkest times!

Porus - who is a willing partner in gentle jokes at the world in general and at ourselves too! We have the most incredible conversations about life.. love and everything in between!

Jana - who met me as a giddyheaded clueless young person who didn't have direction in life.. she saw the potential.. nurtured it.. encouraged me to dream big and do well.. and STILL does!

Brinda - who constantly shows me the meaning of unconditional acceptance and loves me bigtime no matter how unreasonable I can be when I'm in one of my moods!

Varsha - who always has my best interests at heart and expresses her worries openly.. keeps me on the straight and narrow and is fiercely protective about me!

Shriti - who is the ultimate realist and with me being the ultimate idealist she gives me a reality check whenever it is required.. and would do pretty much anything for me as well!

Lavina - who is the most easygoing and accepting person I know.. and is a great sport and always there right with me on all my travels and crazy ideas too! (She was terrified when I did the world's highest bungy jump.. but still came with me for it and watched it on the screen!

Smita - who is the gentlest and softest person I know.. and the most hospitable person in the world.. it's an incredibly open honest and rewarding friendship that we share!

Renu - the one person who I HAVE to talk to every night before going to sleep.. my soul sister who brings a lot of magic masti and madness to my life.. this amazing woman I love dearly!!

Parul - who is invariably my voice of reason.. good sense.. and very "tuned in" to whatever frequency I may be in.. and keeps my feet firmly on the ground.. love her to bits!

Ujwala - twenty years younger than me.. but one of the wisest people I am blessed to know.. She can explain difficult situations impartially and better than almost anyone I know!

Anu - last.. but.. most definitely not the least! She absorbs my wild enthusiasms.. takes them in her stride.. calls a spade a spade.. and loves me more than words can ever express!

There are so many more.. I could go on and on.. but this post is already too long!

To all the gurus in my life.. I bow my head with folded hands and express the deepest gratitude for teaching me.. correcting me.. guiding me.. advising me.. supporting me.. believing in me.. accepting me as I am.. loving me.. and being such an integral part of my life! Abiding respect compassion thanks and love to you all on Guru Purnima!!

GUARDIAN ANGELS – they walk with us!!

 I believe some people enter your life as guardian angels.. and some connections can’t be explained in words alone.. It’s just this inexplicable feeling of total comfort confidence and trust.. and am convinced that these are your guardian angels!

According to religion, the most important duties of guardian angels are to protect and guide us.. but in the times we live in now.. they aren’t too busy.. because we are blessed with multiple people who play that role in our lives!

Being an idealist who views the world through rose-tinted spectacles, I like to believe that parents have their children.. seniors.. their caregivers.. children their parents.. teenagers their parents.. young people their colleagues.. employers have their staff.. office staff have their bosses.. and helpers their employers!

Maybe you haven’t given this a thought.. and you’re charmed by the idea of BEING a guardian angel to somebody.. or manybodies for that matter! How does one do this? It’s actually super simple.. first of all.. choose your “Guardian Angel adoptee” (hereafter referred to as your GAA)! It could be someone a little timid.. shy.. underconfident.. unexposed.. not in the best of health.. facing financial difficulties.. dealing with major family conflict.. you know what I mean!

Try and be your best self.. accepting.. loving and giving.. make that phone call when you know something major is coming up for your GAA.. check in on them regularly.. make plans to meet up JLT (just like that).. stay “tuned in” to the frequency at which THEY resonate..

Some fun facts about guardian angels :

Angels respect hospitality.. An ancient Jewish tradition to see if an angel visited would be to have some sort of food around and to offer it to the angel. Count the biscuits or sandwiches, or bananas (whatever you have handy in your house), and offer one to it. Count again after the angel leaves, and if there is one (or more) less than what you started with, the angel assumed a body!

Angels inspire us.. Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night because an idea popped into your head that you just had to write down so you wouldn’t forget it in the morning? Have you just been inspired to do something out of the ordinary that turned out to be hugely successful? Angels are always trying to inspire us with things that will lead us to happiness..

Angels contain the space in which they operate.. I always imagined that my guardian angel would hover above me and to one side, but since it makes sense that they surround us at all times..

Angels are like snowflakes.. as in each and every single angel is unique and different from any other angel, so much so that each angel could be considered a different species. This means that every angel has their very own, very different personality.

Angels appear more to women than to men.. but if they  are in your life.. you will just KNOW! Women seem to be more receptive, which may be the reason behind this. Angels are highly intuitive beings, so they are likely to be on the same sort of mental wavelength as the female populace.

How do I know this is true and that guardian angels really exist? My biggest and most loving guardian angel is my Daddy.. even after four and a half years, I feel his presence so strongly.. especially when there are important decisions to be taken.. or when I’m feeling a little low.. On a lighter note.. am blessed with so many guardian angels all around me.. unexpected phone calls.. meaningful conversations.. relaxed afternoons.. delicious shared meals..

Every single time something beautiful and wonderful happens in my life, I am so very grateful to the universe for the abundance of guardian angels in my life! They walk WITH us!! Look at the people in your life and see the guardian angels.. and be inspired to be a guardian angel to more people who NEED you.. reach out and remain blessed!!

 

 

 

FIND YOUR FAVOURITE HAPPINESS THERAPY – AND DO IT!!

 Occasionally there are phases when days and days go by and we aren’t happy.. we aren’t SAD.. but we’re just a little “cranky” and not enjoying things as much as we normally would.. SO.. What’s the matter with us? Are we going into a depression? (The number of people who diagnose themselves and others to be going through depression is SCARY!!) Why don’t we feel like meeting our friends? Why don’t we want to spend time with our families.. or read that book.. bake that cake we’ve been wanting to for so long??

The reason is simple.. because we’re lost! We aren’t spending enough time with ourselves and therefore we don’t know what makes us genuinely happy or sad anymore.. Another reason is because we don’t use specific words to qualify our feelings.. let’s try using words like energized.. motivated.. lonely.. instigated.. instead of the insipid and generic “good.. psyched.. blah.. etc..!!

The encouraging news is that it’s relatively simple to come out of the “crankiness”.. all we need to do is be consciously aware of the moments when we’re “top of the world happy” and remember WHAT WE 9or someone else) DID to make us feel that way! Replicate the task.. or the experience.. and.. zip zap zoom – there you are.. floating on cloud 9 once again!

Speaking for myself, I call it “happiness therapy” and it’s fluid.. there are a few that I practise.. and am happy to share them here..

·       Spending half an hour daily with MYSELF.. mobile phone switched OFF.. not on silent.. and have given instructions that I am not to be disturbed for any reason but a dire emergency.. Am either listening to music.. reading.. or just “being”.. it’s becoming my all-time favourite therapy!

·       Watching my all-time favourite movie “The Sound of Music”.. such an uplifting story.. and the songs are just beautiful.. 20 minutes is all it takes to put a big smile on my face!

·       Another super option is making a “to do” list! It just helps me to gather my thoughts.. understand what needs to be done.. plan it and do it! Absolutely LOVE crossing out the tasks as they get done one by one!

·       It could be as simple as playing 3 or 4 back-to-back games of “blood” Ludo (as we call it) with my best friend Sumit.. It’s great fun.. highly competitive.. we “growl” “snarl” “grumble” and are in the happiest of moods when we finish!

·       My ultimate one is tidying up and organizing cupboards! I Am strange and weird.. right? Have been told that umpteen times and am kind of immune to it now!! Will stand by my words and this is why..

I have realized and understood that when my “outer space” is in a mess.. my “inner space” is in a bigger mess! I cannot function in chaos and need order in my life! Those of you who know me well will testify to this and know that when I say I’m cleaning up my cupboard.. all is NOT well in my world!

Impossible to believe but true.. half the year is over already and the pandemic ensures that we still have plenty of challenges ahead.. but staying happy in the head and heart should be on topmost priority every single day!

Most importantly, remember that only YOU know which therapy works best for you.. and WHEN you need it! Spend some quiet time with yourself.. analyze and understand what YOUR special happiness therapy is.. and make sure you do it.. and overdo it.. as much as you can! Do feel free to share it with others too.. just keep spreading the happiness!!

 

 

 

Dabbawallas in the 2020 pandemic

Hello everyone! This is the video shot and compiled by my immensely talented cousin Viraj-Sushi Karnik when we went to distribute grocery staples to the dabbawallas last Saturday!

Thank you once again to each and every one of you who supported this cause with money.. care.. concern.. time.. advice.. and most of all.. kept the faith that this WOULD definitely happen!

MUST make a special mention about my grocer Tinubhai.. when I went to his shop to collect the hard copy bills for the provisions.. he gave me a sealed envelope and told me to go home and count it! Believe it or not.. he returned ₹30000 saying it was left over and that I should use it for my next good cause! Hats off to him for such strong integrity and faith in my good intentions!!

Am truly blessed to have the most generous and wonderful people in my life who are with me through thick and thin.. projects.. causes.. good times and bad.. heartfelt gratitude to the universe and all the incredible people in my life!!

DO watch the video.. it's rather nice!!

https://youtu.be/snoANoVjn6g

FEEDING THE HUNGRY – A JOY & A PRIVILEGE!!

Mahatma Gandhi once said “There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread.” 

A simple truth of life is that it always looks better on a full stomach.. right? YES - for us who are fortunate and blessed to have an abundance of food on the table.. however, everyone is not as lucky! When scruffy little children with endearing smiles (or unkempt and desperate adults with anguished eyes) come up to us at traffic signals or in the middle of Bhaji Galli with outstretched hands saying they haven’t had anything to eat all day (or for a few days) we hand over some money or food OR ignore them as we see fit.. but.. there are others..

There are a number of people who can NOT walk the streets and beg for food or money.. simply because they were once upon a time the backbone of our beloved city Mumbai.. and have fallen on the hardest times ever thanks to the pandemic.. It is the epitome of irony that the people who have ensured that our entire city was “fed” should now be suffering hunger pangs almost constantly! This is a cruel injustice and shockingly, the government is doing absolutely NOTHING to help them..

It was distressing to read a newspaper article about their plight and made me feel that I MUST do something about it! It’s also the time of year when I start thinking of my birthday project (which deserving cause to help) and hence I adopted this forthwith.. it’s been a crazy number of telephone calls and chats but finally it is organized.. Ritesh (who is the head of the Dabbawallah’s Association is a young man of 25, qualified as an MBA and who is coordinating relief supplies for them) and I have connected with each other and spoken at length and it has been decided that we (my friends and I) will provide rations to 800 dabbawallahs who live on the Western Railway line..

The “relief staples goody bag” contains all this and is priced at Rs.1500..

·       5 kgs rice

·       5 kgs wholewheat flour

·       2 kgs tuver dal

·       2 pouches Sunday oil

·       1 kg Tata Agni tea

·       3 kgs sugar

·       1 kg Tata salt

·       100 gms haldi powder

·       100 gma dhania powder

·       100 gms red chilly powder

Needless to say, this would have been impossible without the tremendous support of my friend Tinubhai who owns and manages the wonderful Welcome Supermarket in Bhaji Galli, Grant Road (West).. He has coordinated with wholesale dealers in Navi Mumbai.. negotiated the best prices possible.. and is coordinating EVERYTHING.. delivery from Navi Mumbai.. sending the smaller goods from his shop to the godown in Dadar.. sending his boys to do the assembly line packing of each jumbo bag.. AND sending them to help with distribution as well! A very big THANK YOU (in advance) for all the help received!

Another big thank you goes out to my friends Sangeeta and Uday who have made a generous donation towards this worthy cause as well.. and of course my dear friend Kavita who couldn’t take the Rs.1500 out of her wallet fast enough as soon as she heard about the project!

As everyone knows, I have stopped ALL gifting and this is one of my pet projects, so if you would like to reach out and help the dabbawallahs, it will be a special and meaningful “birthday gift” to me! My accountant Rajesh has said strictly no bank transfers to be made so you can send me the cash or pledge it now and give it to me whenever we meet next! This is the biggest donation I have ever committed to (Rs.12,00,000 of which Sangeeta and Uday have given Rs.50,000) so anything else that comes in will be very welcome!

A number of you who read my blog always tell me it brings you tremendous joy.. and now this is an opportunity to bring a little joy to the people who really need it!

P.S. Do post your names along with your comments.. it’s lovely to read them!!

 

LIGHT – IN DIFFERENT WAYS.. AT DIFFERENT TIMES.. AND FOR DIFFERENT REASONS..

 “When the sun is shining I can do anything; no mountain is too high, no trouble too difficult to overcome.” – Wilma Rudolph

 Am sure that Wilma Rudolph’s quote must have resonated with a number of you.. and you must have smiled and/or nodded your heads while reading.. and thought to yourselves “this is so true!” We who experience a true Indian summer in all its might and glory (including me) DO grumble about how “it’s too hot.. it’s SO sunny.. the sun is “biting” me..” etc.. Having said that.. we all still accept and acknowledge (including doctors) the light of the sun has amazing healing and helping properties!

So this is the reason for today’s blog..

The building I live in is undergoing major structural repairs for a while now and all my windows had been boarded up for close to 4 months.. it was maddening to have to use electric light during the daytime and there were days when I was really grouchy! It was also extremely disorienting to be in stygian darkness at night.. thanks to which my waking up time and morning body clock went beserk! I was waking up at 5 am one day.. 9 am another.. and once as late as 11 am.. when my helper came to check on why I wasn’t awake YET! (I suspect she thought I had finally swiped my one-way ticket and gone to meet my maker!!)

 When I came out of my shower yesterday, something immediately struck me as different and beautiful in my bedroom! I stepped into my room to see it brightly bathed in a beautiful golden light (also thanks to the yellow sacking material covering the scaffolding) and what a gorgeous uplifting sight it was! Even though I had to look THROUGH the sacking, at least I could see the trees and clouds outside.. people walking on the road.. and THAT was a truly magical feeling! There was this incredible sense of “lightness”.. joy in the heart.. an ear-to-ear smile on my face.. and true happiness!

Every one of us needs light from the sun.. it gives us energy to work.. play.. see.. grow.. survive.. live.. thrive AND see rainbows!! Let’s not forget that sunlight is the key component in photosynthesis which is the process by which plants convert energy.. Electric light helps us to cut through darkness.. be innovative.. stay awake longer.. watch television.. and makes it possible for us to have longer daylight hours.. travel.. use machinery.. and the list is endless!

Light enables human beings to be magicians as well.. and much has been written about this.. let me explain what I mean here.. Right now.. more than ever.. there is a tremendous amount of “darkness” in the world.. the darkness of people losing their jobs.. of not having food on the table.. of friction with the family.. of being confined to the house (because of age or health reasons).. of not being able to travel (that’s me!!).. each one is facing their own challenges.. and THIS is the time to awaken the magician within you.. How do I do that you ask? This is my answer..

You can do and/or be any or all of these things..

Be “all sweetness and light” with the people you love..

Go light on someone.. be gentle.. try not to be critical..

Hide your light under a bushel.. be extremely modest..

Be the light at the end of someone’s tunnel.. be the solution to their problem..

Light a fire under someone.. motivate someone to take action..

Be a ray of light.. bring hope to those who have none..

See something or someone in a new light.. understand something or someone in a new positive way..

Light up someone.. cause them to more cheerful.. animated and excited..

Have light-bulb moments.. generate great ideas!

MOST IMPORTANTLY.. be the light of someone’s life!!

GRATITUDE - AT EVERY LEVEL.. IS THE ONLY WAY!!

“At times, our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.” – Albert Schweitzer

Very well said.. and I am in complete concurrence with the above quote.. 

Gratitude.. at every level.. is the ONLY way!! As a little girl in nursery school, we were taught a prayer to be recited at the end of the day "Thank you for the world so sweet.. thank you for the food we eat.. thank you for the birds that sing.. thank you God for EVERYTHING.." Chances are I didn't quite understand the sheer power of the gratitude I was expressing.. but age life and experience have taught me a great deal.. and if at the age of 57 (and closer to 58) there were STILL things to be learned about this, the pandemic taught me all of them!!

As human beings.. we are grateful.. for comfortable homes.. food on the table.. secure jobs.. loving families.. understanding friends.. BUT.. there's so much more to this than the seemingly obvious! We in India are privileged to staff working for us (be it live in or part time).. and I am truly blessed to have two live in staff (Savita and Kishore) who have been with me for 31 and 27 years respectively! After such a long time, they have become family and rock solid supporters in any and every crisis!

Kishore went to "gaon" for his bi-annual reunion with family and he went by train laden with all kinds of goodies from the "big city".. despite my insistence that he fly back, he insisted on taking the train back as well.. He was quarantined at an "ashram" for a week on his return and got tested for Covid the day before he was to come home.. unfortunately he tested positive and it was terrifying! I was panicked because it was a crisis I had never dealt with yet.. was frantically calling friends and doctors to ask what to do.. calling hotels all of whom said they wouldn't accept a Covid positive patient.. Finally my great friend and family doctor Porus told me to check him into Krishna Palace Hotel for 14 days! The hotel staff was amazing.. the manager Bilkis Ma'am very kind.. they had a doctor who checked the patients daily.. prescribed vitamins and medicines.. haldiwalla milk daily.. "kaadha" daily.. organized a steamer for him at my request.. and nothing was too much trouble! God was kind and Kishore was completely asymptomatic except for a temperature of 99.0 on one day.. which was a mercy because he's diabetic! I was supremely grateful for the care he received!

He is quiet and doesn't say much (some people find him taciturn) but he has the kindest heart in the world and a fantastic work ethic.. but he's not much of a talker.. When he came home and we met (after 84 days!!) he came to me with folded hands and these were his words "I don't know how to say much because I'm not good with words.. but with folded hands I want to thank you.. Of course for the money you spent on the hotel and medicines.. but more than that, for calling me twice every single day and checking on me.. sending me fruit.. chatting with me.. asking if I was alright.. Thanks to you, I have gotten through these days and yes, I WAS born in the village and that is all very well, but to me.. wherever you are.. THAT'S family for me!" I was absolutely humbled.. in tears.. overwhelmed.. and gobsmacked.. all at once! 

Kishore isn't educated but he taught me a wonderful lesson and imparted some priceless wisdom to me that day.. and that's what I am sharing with you.. We need to constantly aspire to be that "safe space.. family.. haven.. and home" to whoever needs it.. and not just with money.. with kindness.. acceptance.. time.. and above all.. with gratitude! Gratitude to all those who make our lives happier.. richer.. easier.. smoother.. and more comfortable!

I have been practising gratitude actively and consciously for the last few years now and it has brought amazing rewards of inner peace and contentment to my life.. have met some really special like-minded people and learned so much from them.. have also made some progress on my own path of learning.. self-realization and spirituality.. It has empowered me to take some big decisions.. I have stopped all birthday and anniversary gifting.. we all have whatever we need.. and more often than not, gifts get recycled.. added to that the stress of remembering who gave what.. remember to reciprocate equally or with more.. It was just TOO MUCH drama! My friends were very happy to agree so now we meet without the gifting and celebrate the friendship or the occasion without any pressure.. and it is super fun!!

Last year, I also decided to stop ALL Diwali gifting as well.. fortunately friends and family were very accepting cooperative and supportive to this as well.. As a gesture of gratitude, however, I DID go to Bhaji Galli and gave all 27 employees at my supermarket and ALL my various and sundry bhajiwallas and vendors 1000 rupees each! Not a huge amount of money.. but to see those big smiles and glistening eyes made it oh so worthwhile! These are the people I chose to honour and show my appreciation to.. and the joy it gave me was and is indescribable!

Let's all start practising gratitude right away and transform our lives.. do acknowledge all the wonderful people and blessings in your life every single day.. thank God or the universe for them.. be kind.. do good.. and see your life change magically!!