FRIENDSHIP – THE BEST THERAPY EVER!!

 Friendship is defined in the dictionary as "a relationship of mutual affection between people. It is a stronger form of interpersonal bond than an association."

Ever since I was a toddler, I have memories of wandering all over the building firmly holding hands with my oldest friend Varsha.. eating two dinners every evening - first at my house.. and then at hers.. and THEN we used to shamelessly go and sit downstairs on the low wall outside the watchmen’s little shed.. Watching them cooking their dinner including fresh thick hot rotis and greedy little mouths watering, our old and trusted, very affectionste Nepali watchman would with a knowing gentle indulgent smile ask us “Garam roti khayega baby log?” to which we would eagerly reply in the affirmative! We would be given a delicious hot roti each with salt sprinkled on top (the poor man’s budget being stretched already with giving us BOTH  a roti each daily) which we ate with gusto! The watchman was one of our first friends.. cupboard love at it’s best!

We who live in Mumbai are truly lucky.. we grow up with building friends.. friends from extra-curricular classes.. school friends.. college friends.. “train friends”.. office friends.. gym friends.. and now.. thanks to technology.. also virtual friends!! Some of my closest friends today are people I’ve met on the internet.. and although it can be scary.. you can meet some amazing people there.. as I have!

My Dad was a bit of a rolling stone career-wise.. we moved continents once.. so childhood friends are very few.. and I was a bit of a late bloomer so have a few school friends.. but came into my own right from the first day of college! Looking at my core group today, a number of them are people I met in college and they are also my 3 AM friends!

Many moons ago, my mother used to practically “accuse” me of being “obsessed” with my friends.. and say things like “when you’re in trouble.. remember.. it’s going to be only family that stands by you.. not friends!” As it turned out.. life has now become a situation where your friends.. and often.. your neighbours are your family too! I have experienced this first-hand on numerous crisis occasions.. just a phone call to say “I need help” and no questions asked, there has been a veritable army of friends just waiting to help!

Friendship to me has always meant being there for each other.. unquestioning acceptance.. celebrating the commonalities AND the differences.. feeling safe enough to get drunk.. act crazy (I don’t need to ACT!!).. confess misdeeds without the fear of being judged.. going that extra mile to put a smile on someone’s face.. trusting someone completely.. giving in.. letting go.. being able to take someone for granted in the nicest possible way.. do silly impetuous things with.. talk all night long about something, nothing and everything.. cry together.. share successes with.. call at any time of the day or night without any hesitation.. and above all.. to be able to do this with an abiding mutual respect and unconditional LOVE!!

Often I have wild enthusiasms that are crazy and impetuous.. but am blessed to have friends are are happy to participate in the madness.. whether it is taking off for a weekend in the clothes we’re wearing.. trying to teach English to street children.. tracking down and reaching out to a dentist to sponsor bicycles enabling Adivasi children to be able to go to school based on an article on the internet.. The list is endless.. I could go on and on!

There are friends I have made travelling on flights.. off the internet.. incredible vendors I met through the pandemic.. professors who have taught me.. colleagues.. neighbours.. friends of friends.. just people with whose lives my path have met or crossed.. and we have been in touch.. stayed in touch.. and it’s always been wonderful!

As of 2020, I decided to STOP all gifting for birthdays, Diwali etc.. because it meant more to me to share a lovely meal or a leisurely weekend at my home in Lonavala with them instead.. Friends DESERVE and NEED the gift of time.. no mobiles to be answered.. no interruptions.. no distractions.. just pure “time with each other”.. it’s the ultimate therapy! Friends are people to be admired, cherished, pampered, treasured, valued and loved!

Friendship.. to me.. is pure oxygen! It is essential necessary crucial and imperative for me to remain functioning at an optimal level.. and this comes out to all of you wonderful friends who I try to keep in touch with.. as regularly as possible! My bestie Sumit finds it unbelievable that I have friends that I talk to EVERY single day.. but that’s just the way it is.. and I wouldn’t have it any other way!

Near.. far.. wherever you are.. if you are reading this right now.. know always that you are a friend I treasure.. care about.. and will always be here for you.. in whatever way possible.. to the best of my ability..

This blog is a little long but then.. all this HAD to be shared with you all.. thank you.. as always.. for reading!