HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY!!

 International Women's Day is celebrated in many countries around the world. It is a day when women are publicly recognized, acknowleged and sometimes even rewarded for their achievements in multiple diverse spheres such as ethnic.. linguistic.. cultural.. economic or political to name a few..

This is a day dedicated to celebrating women and that’s the main reason why I absolutely love it! Growing up in India where it’s often considered a “sorrow or bad luck” to have a daughter.. I love that as an urban people at least.. we are finally acknowledging women and the value they bring to their homes families workplaces.. and to the world as a whole!

I was super blessed and lucky to be born to my parents because my father wanted a daughter with all his heart! He was obviously happy to have had a son earlier.. but when my mother was expecting me.. he was so excited.. decided on a name.. chose a beautiful piece of jewellery for me and barely managed to contain his excitement until I arrived!

Me being the typical “drama queen” baby.. there was high drama before my birth as well.. It was a toxaemia pregnancy for Mummy and even though I weighed just 4 pounds (yes I mean 4 lbs not kgs!) I had to come into the world by Caesarean section! So I was this “precious and very much wanted princess” for my Dad and that continued as long as he lived..

I remember my childhood as a time filled chock-a-block with caring sharing pampering travelling jokes laughter hugs kisses and cuddles with a proportionate amount of discipline and training thrown in for good measure! There were rules accompanied by rewards and punishments as the case demanded.. and expectations with consequences depending on whether they were fulfilled or not..

Not having children of my own but blessed to have a finger in the pies of over 700 children during their formative years I want to say here that there is SO MUCH effort that goes into raising a girl and training her to grow into a fine woman.. one that is worthy of respect admiration love and much more! It includes tireless motivation.. encouragement.. time.. heartache.. sacrifice.. frustration.. sometimes disappointment.. and a seemingly unending supply of patience understanding and unconditional love and acceptance!

Girls grow into young women.. they go through “growing pains”.. usually aren’t encouraged to voice or raise their woes.. are told very often to “suffer in silence” (like their mothers and grandmothers).. Once they are young women.. on the other hand.. they are told to learn to cook.. study hard and do well academically.. work and be successful.. make good money.. get on par with the men in their workspace.. run a great house.. be amazing wives.. raise terrific children.. and all this without a murmur about the “cost to self”!

Create that Powerpoint presentation.. teach the little one how to tie his shoelaces himself.. make the mithai for Diwali using the traditional family recipe.. be dressed well at all times.. talk sense with the husband’s boss and his wife while entertaining them over drinks and dinner.. make sure that the “diya” is lit and the family (at least the children) say their prayers daily.. AND become Superwoman (without the cape) when the househelp goes AWOL!

Woman are blessed with a tremendous capacity to multitask.. to organize.. to calm hysterical babies and senior citizens.. to miraculously find missing homework.. books and car keys that aren’t to be found anywhere.. to instinctively plan menus that appeal to everyone (no mean feat, this).. to balance the responsibilities at “maika” “sasural” workplace and everywhere else as well!

And HOW ON EARTH do they manage to do all this AND smile through the madness? It’s simple.. they (I mean WE) do it from a mindset and space of compassion love gentleness and a deep-seated desire for harmony and happiness around us! And just imagine.. all we want in return is a little respect and affection and acknowledgement of our untiring efforts!

Everyone reading this.. whether you’re male or female.. please stop for a moment.. think of all the incredible women in your life and all that they have done for you.. as mothers.. sisters.. “bhabhies”.. sisters-in-law.. teachers.. students.. friends.. neighbours.. bosses.. helpers.. and ACKNOWLEDGE them.. CELEBRATE them and TELL THEM how special they are.. and that your life is easier better nicer and happier because THEY are in it! THAT will be a true celebration of March 8^th being International Women’s Day!!

Happy Women’s Day to ALL the gorgeous amazing talented creative successful hardworking artistic brilliant and super-duper women out there!! Always remember that YOU rock ladies!!

THE JOY OF OLD FRIENDS.. incomparable and unmatched!

When I turned 60 last year and had a big party to celebrate.. what struck me was the number of friends who came to celebrate with me! Overwhelmed by the love.. hugs.. dancing.. singing.. excitement and sentiment of the occasion it hit me that one of the greatest blessings we receive in life is strong and unconditional friendships..

Wealth managers recommend investing in equities.. mutual funds.. SIPs.. AIFs and whatnot.. but according to me.. the best investment you can make is in strong friendships with good people!  What do I mean by good people? The kind of people who inspire you.. believe in you.. understand you.. commiserate with you over your sorrows and celebrate your joys more enthusiastically than you do!

Everyone who knows me for any length of time knows that my friends are the MOST important people in the world to me.. always have been.. and always will be! As a teenager my Mom used to tell me “What is this? Friends.. friends and friends all the time? Remember that when things get tough.. it will be only FAMILY that will stand by you and support you! Don’t be obsessed with your friends all the time!”

Mom.. wherever you are (and I know you’re watching as well as listening.. this is one matter in which I am super happy to prove you wrong in a resounding way! God has blessed me with the BEST friends in the world and they have “been there” for me through thick and thin.. sick and sin.. and just everything that’s happened in life.. for which I am and will always be eternally grateful!

It was a friend who rushed with me to hospital when Mom fell down and broke her hip.. when Mom had to have a feeding tube inserted in her stomach (I was at the eye specialist with Dad getting some “jhaankhi” removed).. It was a friend who made me register with an emergency ambulance service seeing that Mom and Dad were going to hospital every so often!

It was friends who rallied round when my marriage was on the rocks.. who took me into their hearts and home and cherished me for the 12 weeks it took for me annulment to come through.. and friends who gathered around when I got back to India and made sure I wasn’t alone depressed and brooding over what had happened..

Being single (and not wanting to mingle).. it has always been friends who made sure to invite me over on festivals so I get to share that precious feeling of “family time”.. and friends who have agreed to come with me on holidays so I don’t have to travel alone!

Since Covid I have made a few new and solid friends.. they are the people who pray for me.. protect me.. and who encouraged me to a greater awareness of the importance of spiritual growth.. and pretty much changed the trajectory and focus of my life.. What an incredible blessing they are!

Last week I flew down to Bangalore to celebrate a very old friend’s birthday.. he’s just 61 but the friendship has been for about 45 years! I coordinated with his wife (who’s a darling) and made a surprise visit.. literally just landed up at his door! THAT look of pure joy on his face made the two hour drive from the airport in horrendous traffic totally worthwhile! And the hug we shared kind of just made the years melt away bathing the day in a beautiful glow of happiness! Suhas and Medha.. this one’s especially for you both!

Old friends are the people who you can ask the dumbest questions without the fear of being judged.. the ones you can talk to about something anything nothing and walk away feeling like it was the best conversations you ever had.. the ones who are genuinely concerned about you and call to check how you’re doing every once in a while.. the ones you crack the silliest jokes with and laugh with like a mad person..

Old friends are the people you knew in school.. building friends.. college friends.. neighbours.. and perhaps workmates too.. they are the people to miss.. love.. cherish and keep in touch with.. By all means go out and make new friends too.. it takes every colour of crayon to “complete the box” and all your friends enrich and enhance your life in some way or the other!

In the immortal words of someone unknown but extremely wise “Friends are the family you choose for yourself”.. and good friends are the ones who you NEVER take for granted so go ahead and send that message.. call.. meet up.. and always remember to tell them that you love them.. Life is short and unpredictable so don’t wait for tomorrow!

They are the people who love you unconditionally and in a world where most things come with an “*conditions apply”.. HOW special and precious is that?

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